Express Lane

I really don't have much to say ABOUT the express lane, but that has to be the title of today's entry because, though lacking much to chatter about, it has been, undoubtedly, the most important part of today. Yes, indeed, I discovered the expresslanes this morning. While the rest of the city crept along, I fairly flew to work this morning. I arrived half an hour before I'm expected and took advantage of the time to sit by myself, in the near dark, and consider my little library. I actually looked at the newspaper, and contempted the stacks of newly arrived books that I must process. And, while enjoying my peaceful little moment, before opening, I was summoned, by loud knock, to the door.

My students must have a passcard to open the doors in our school. However, no student cards work before 8 AM. I am most usually here by 7:45 and even leaving the lights out does not prevent them knocking on the door so that I can admit them. Apparently this morning I was too slow to open the door and my student visitor turned and left. Perhaps she assumed that I was not going to open the door since it was not yet opening time. She returned, promptly at 8 and had nasty words for me about how the library should be open before 8 for students who have classes at 8. She's really quite angry and I will have to learn how to handle this type of complaining SOME DAY. Either that or I will find myself making the new library hours sign and be shocked when I realize that I've designed a sign for a library that opens at 5 AM....

Students often fail to bring their passcards to school and I spend a lot of my time opening the door for students....I'm not sure how to address this problem either... I have one student in particular, a cheerful, smiling young man who is always pleasant company. He usually the library alot and for that I am grateful, but for the entire month I've been here, he never has had a passcard. We joke and I tell him that Im going to charge a toll for entry, tootsie rolls maybe. Clearly he has no concern for my jovial adminishing. This morning I was a little more firm and said, "hey! I mean it, you need to see the IT manager for a new passcard." His response was, "Whatever." He turned his back and walked away from me and hasn't been in the library since then - he usually is here 3 or 4 times a day. What is the balance in this? Must I do as my students demand in order to keep their patronage? At what point am I a servant, and I wish to be servant to them, and when do I become a pushover? I somehow did not anticipate these sorts of questions, not yet anyway.

But! I found the expressway and I flew to work this morning. And, tomorrow, I will finish processing this latest shipment of books.

Now, I have to ask myself, "why have I begun this?" The truth is, I have no idea why, nor do I have any more idea than that what I will discuss. But, I've enjoyed reading other's blogs, and so I thought to give it a try for myself. So, with the tiniest of intuitive urging, I begin....

I am Lee and I am also a librarian. It gives me such a thrill to be able to say that. Years of searching following graduate school had left me wondering if I would ever really be able to say, "I am a librarian." It feels almost like a victory cry, I can nearly imagine myself on the top of some mountain, looking out over a vast ocean and shouting, book in hand. Of course, no one would hear me, and the book would be getting soggy with all that mountain fog and ocean spray. But no matter! I AM A LIBRARIAN.

And - I'm a brand new, faltering, taking babysteps librarian. So perhaps here, I will share the flow of my days, my interactions with students, my trials and lessons as I learn things I've never done before like covering books in that goovy plastic (do you just cover them all? Or only those that seem frail and likely to tear?) and my daily celebratory reminder that no matter how confused I get, no matter how much it seems that I have to learn, "I AM A LIBRARIAN!"

As I sit writing, one of the students, in my art school, is cutting up tiny pieces of paper, and glueing them into a book. It looks like a fabulous project, it looks exciting and forces me to restrain from finding something similiar (I want to create beautiful things too!). However, she's working on her project on my check-out space; I thought she would be only a brief moment when I agreed to allow her to use my scissors.....but it looks as though she might be quite sometimel Oh! no! she's cleaning up and heading out....maybe that's b/c I did not have the glue stick she requested.

The library is filled, anxious looks, and whispers...the creativity in this place is fairly palpable and made more so by the tension of projects due just before we leave for the holiday. I see some desperation, some determination and lots of excitement. I love this library, I love these students - I just wish they'd bring their own glue, and use it somewhere that's not my desk...and as I type, I look up to discover that one student is using the glue somewhere else, over her keyboard....and now, off to explain (again) about choosing the proper printer...