Hello, Again, Hello

Maybe some of you have noticed my absence. That feels kind of nice. I have made a major life change and amidst all the tulmult, there has been simply no time for blogging. There might be soon - but either way, I wanted to pop in and say hello and not leave you wondering what might have become of me. Terri, if you will email me your mailing address, I will send your book off right away. I have it all ready to go. I look forward to reading all your updates and catching up here soon. ~Lee

Attitude of Gratitude

Morning came too quickly. The night was spent in that hazy, lost place of sleep, not sleep. I woke with a jolt and for a moment greeted some unknown fear; something not in its place, someone not where they should be - or where I wished them to be. The sounds of the street already telling me that it is morning, whether I wished it to be or not. I walked differently this morning than other mornings, I left the safe space which I'm not so sure is all that safe for me anymore. My arm is sore; in the foggy sleeplessness of the night, I must have turned wrong, I must have slept wrong, I must have done something wrong. Without meaning to, I walked towards where Cochise had been. I saw the blackspot, still on the road. I stood there, kneading my arm and then I realized. I have an arm. It's not in some salvage yard somewhere. Oh c'mon Lee; let's not be dramatic shall we? But yes, drama or no, I have an arm, hey! I have two! And I have two feet to walk in his lovely city. Suddenly the air felt moist on my cheeks. Oh goofy, that's not the air, you're crying. Oh. My heart is heavy....but my heart feels. Between joy and sorrow my heart dances. There are laughs yet to be bellowed and tears yet to fall, dances to dance and secrets to reveal. How can I be anything but grateful?

And thank you to Terri, for reminding me to add also, "Thank you Mary Frances and Effie Lucille, I am grateful for your love, your example, your strength, your constant belief in me and I pray my life will someday honor yours."

~Lee

Friday Night Knitting Club

Hi everyone - I have your names in a hat (well, really a basket.) I was not very focused this weekend and did not actually draw a name. I'll do that tonight. I don't even remember who won the race! By Wednesday I'll let you know. ~Lee

Making Five Good Things from some not so good things

Saturday morning, I drove my "back up" truck. My truck was named Cochise more than ten years ago by friends of mine. Cochise was my first major purchase after divorce; and I sure loved that truck. On the way home, Cochise overheated just like my "real" car. I pulled off to a side street and walked home, figuring to go later, fill the radiator and drive him home. But....making a long story short, after I walked home, Cochise burst into flames and exploded. There's nothing left of him; even the windows are melted. I'm pretty sad about this loss...not to mention currently having no car.

But! this seems timely, no?

• I was not inside when Cochise exploded
• No one was hurt; they could well have been
• I will save lots of money riding the bus, it's the right thing to do anyway
• I will get lots of knitting done while I ride the bus
• This provides me an opportunity to take some direction in my life and answer some questions that have lingered for long

Occasionally we must be propelled into change. I think the Universal 2 X 4 hasn't been working in my case and so an explosion was necessary. I have loads of thinking to do; and contemplating one's life is always a good thing - how does it go? Something about the unexamined life not being worth living? So now, I get to examine my life. Wish me luck.

~Lee

Saturday Morning

I so did not want to post anything today. I had a really rotten, lonely, sad Friday night. I tried to finish those zippers; I really did try. I thought I had it all figured out. Zip (hahaha). I went to bed way early, kept getting up, can't remember if I ate and I am generally still feeling sorry for myself. Some days I get it, and some days I don't and last night I sure didn't. I feel like stomping and yelling and breaking china. So...what is there to be done about it? I'm going walking.... I'm going to try and let five good things in. As they say, acknowledge the feeling and let it pass, as feelings do. I sure hope.

Lessons the Microwave Taught Me

This is a make-something-bigger-when it's really very small post. I'm not sure why I thought of this on this cold Friday morning (yes I am, tsk tsk little white lies). Remember those days, maybe today, when you complained and crabbed-assed about doing the dishes? Well...I, cool, grown-up lady that I am, no longer complain about doing the dishes. Or, truth told, very many chores that I have to do at all. I find other things to complain about but the dishes, the dusting, sweeping and the like no longer bother me at all. I had an aha..one I share frequently with my children.

Most of my life we did not have a microwave - something about organic produce, tofu and beansprouts just did not gel with microwave. Then, I woke up in my new life, where I had a microwave and frequently that microwave is used to do very small little jobs, two minutes or so. Now, what do you do when you're waiting for a two minute treat to pop out of your microwave. Do you stand there and watch it? I did, fascinated, I tried to see if MY internal counting of the passing seconds kept pace with the machine's internal clock. Once I'd mastered this skill I grew bored and looked around my world for new and challenging tasks. Ahem. There they were; not far away. Yeah. Uh huh. And, I discovered that I can unload and usually put away most of a full dishwasher in less than three minutes. I discovered that I can sweep the kitchen in less than three also. I can do a sink of dishes, rinse and fuss with how they are stacked in less than three minutes. I can even make it to the closest bathroom, wipe the sink and tidy up before that dinger dings. Since that first aha! I've discovered whole bunches of things I can do in less than three minutes. Lately I've moved on to the three minute stretch, a prayer or several, even a few yoga poses that I never, ever seen to find time to do.

This morning, I was waiting for my little dinger to dink. There were no dishes to wash, floor was passable and bathroom is for later tonight - nothing to do! Stretch? Already did that. Meditate? Umm too edgy this morning (my car blew up last night so I'm a little moody shall we say). What? What? Stand silent for three minutes?

Do you know that you can almost, if you're not too fussy, pack your lunch in less than three minutes? Yup. Yogurt, orange, leftover spaghetti and a couple of graham crackers and a few pepper slices. Done. Saved myself an $8 lunch - in less than three minutes. I guess I have to add that to the list of things I can't complain about. Pretty soon I'll be practically a saint!

Hope you have a fabulous weekend! ~LeeA
Who was very sweet and left off all the things her ex husband could do in less than three minutes

Christmas Quilt

I promised this photo a long time ago. Step son was in no hurry but he finally took this wonderful photo for us. Just in case you think I only make little tiny things. He thinks this quilt is wonderful and actually, I'm pretty pleased with how it turned out. He sent the photos today, and I just wanted to share it. Till tomorrow ~ LeeA