She's Here, She's Here!!!

Ahhh, it is so good to be with your children after a long absence. What is that motherhood thing? What is it that makes us crave the presence of our children; whether or not they are the perfect children we want them to be? Can that be tracked to a hormone? Is it culturally inspired? Or, am I the only one? I can't be.

As I told you before, my daughter is beautiful, funny, hard-working, devoted, passionate and so much more. But it is almost as though none of those things matter, all of her wonderful qualities, and perhaps all of her not-so-wonderful qualities are irrelevant. At just the sight of her, my heart exploded, I felt like I'd had a long, cool drink of the purest water after a long, dry night. I feel like all good things are possible. Then there's this mysterious feeling that I have for my grandsons; they are delicious! They are innocent and pure and I could just wallow in the delight of their presence. Where does that come from? What instinct could account for my attachment to these young boys? Wherever it comes from; it is there and I am reeling in its strong, heady grip.

Now, there have been bumps in the path. There have been short words and hot breath. There has been confusion and chaos without doubt. But even so, it just feels right, even when it's not perfect.

The first night, I was so excited to see them, so high, so jubilant. I forgot the time. The plane, delayed by East Coast hurricane threat, arrived more than two hours late at nearly midnight. The children were wired, and we simply forgot ourselves. Ummm, I taught them to slide the hardwood floors on their socks - it was after 2 AM! Wince. I had no clue what time it was until my irate neighbor banged on the door. Man, was I embarrassed. But, I was so drunk with their presence, so lost in love that I just forgot the hour and the environment. Nothing existed but these precious humans.

I think we've done some better since that first night. I think my drunkness has passed(some anyways). We are getting more accustomed to a proper bedtime and it gets a touch earlier each night. I'm learning to let my daughter parent her children and to hold my tongue. I'm also learning that it's okay for me to grandparent. How different that is! Do you remember saying, "NO!" to your children and the onset of wailing? Well..when mama says "No!" there is indeed, wailing. When malee says,"No!" there is wide-eyed wonder. I can just hear that little brain whirling with, "Ummm what do I do now???" But there is no wailing. And, I get kisses and hugs and smiles. Sure, I also get nasty looks, and stubborn faces too...but it's all just perfect.

Ahh, I could continue long about this new experience. And, I probably will in days to come - or maybe over at MamaleeA. For now, they're here! We've done several touristy things, Snoqualmie Falls (the second touristy thing that all tourists do in Seattle - Pike Place being the first, but we are saving that for a more prosperous weekend), the ferry to an Island and shoving our feet in the warm sand at Alki Beach. Here they are at Snoqualmie. Were I a decent photographer she'd not be standing in front of those gorgeous falls. Eh, I picked the more beautiful subject I think.

Really, it's all good!

~Lee